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Is She Adopted?

 
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MessagePosté le: Sam 20 Déc 2008, 01:27    Sujet du message: Is She Adopted? Répondre en citant

Rude, Stupid, and Annoying Questions People Ask Parents

From Vincent Iannelli, M.D.,
Your Guide to Pediatrics.
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Is She Adopted?



Unfortunately, interracial or biracial couples often get asked if their baby is adopted if he or she looks very much like the other parent.
Consider an Asian dad and a Caucasian mom, who have kids who look mostly Asian. When seen in public alone with their mom, many people will assume that she has adopted them. I guess that isn't a big deal, as long as they keep it to themselves, but often they will say something in front of the kids, like 'where did you adopt them from.'
In this situation, instead of only thinking about adoption, consider that the child might have interracial parents. And then don't say anything either way unless you really know the family.
And even if you are right and the child is adopted, why would you think it is appropriate to comment about this in front of the child? Depending on the situation, there is a fair chance that child hasn't been told yet that he is adopted and your rude comment may have done a lot more harm than you could ever imagine.
Other stupid and thoughtless things that people say when kids really are adopted include:
  • Which child is 'really' yours?
  • How much did you pay for them?
  • Why did their parents give them up?
  • Where are their 'real' parents?
  • Couldn't you have your own kids?
  • Why didn't you adopt an American child?
  • Are they 'real' brothers and sisters?
  • Do they have the same father?


http://pediatrics.about.com/od/parentingadvice/ss/05_annoying_sbs_7.htm


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